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18 October 2013

Women of Value: N is for Negotiate


N is for NEGOTIATE: Women of Value are Negotiators!

I chose the above image to start off this blog entry because to me it gives the perfect visual as to what negotiation is about; bringing together the different coloured opinions, thoughts, views and ideas of people around a table, to find a solution that will reflect the hues and tones of each represented at the negotiation.  

We all would have experienced negotiation in some form and the many different styles that there are.  Negotiation  does not have to be negative experience; indeed it can be very enriching experience from which we can learn so much about others and about ourselves.  

As Women of Value we have to learn to be partnership negotiators, with a focus of resolving the situation without making someonĂ© else's colour as it were fade out.  In essence, negotiation is an art form and we need to come to the negotiation table as artists: as painters who have in mind a beautiful painting.  

Watch the video above featuring a dear friend Lynne Sinclair Taylor in action painting. Look at the way she uses colours to bring out the vibrancy and life of that which she is painting, I just adore the strong colours she uses and mixes with such skill.  Negotiation does not have to be pale; it is not about people holding back their opinion or the thought that in compromising on our position that it means the outcomes are dull and boring or unworkable and untenable.  When the negotiation is complete, you want it be a picture than many can stand back and admire.   

I would also encourage you to check out Lynne's website at www.lynnesinclairtaylor.com/art  for her amazing work.  Her Autumn Ripples picture which I have shown below is a profound visual of negotiation: see the blending of colours within the work, but see how also overall the strength and clarity in the whole picture despite the myriad of colours that have been used.

So this is what I want you to take away today: before you start any negotiation ask yourself what is the picture that is to be painted?  If it is a relationship matter say between yourself and a teenage daughter about her not focussing on her studies: what is the picture in mind that you want to see at the end of this negotiation? I beat it is not a picture of you both yelling and screaming at each other and then storming off and slamming various doors!  

When it comes to negotiation start with the end in  mind and I can guarantee this will create amazing outcomes for all parties involved.


Igniting Dreams | Evoking Action

Love Maree

Women of Value: M for Motivate


M is for MOTIVATE: Women of Value are Motivated!

Motivation does not come to you as a feeling or emotion; motivation comes in the process of momentum.  Take a step and momentum will start, take another step and momentum will begin to build, as momentum builds motivation will start to rise.  Motivation is not some mystical feeling, pie in the sky idea that it seems only a few people can grasp hold of.  I have a lot of conversations with people who say I will do this and I will do that, I will go here and I will there, but only when I get motivated.  

Your best is still in front of you!

Motivation can not be brought over the counter, motivation is earned as you set yourself to the action and actions you need to take towards the goals, the objectives, the dreams that you have.  It is hard to stir motivation when you are tired, stressed, overwhelmed, directionless; you need to ask yourself what is it you want to do, where is it you want to go.  If you had your dream day what would that look like, what type of clients would you have walk into your business, what would be the balance in your bank account, what type of enjoyment would you be experiencing in your relationships? What would be on your list of places you want to travel to or a house you want to build or a charity that you want to support and be a part of? 

Motivation is like a seed, it grows when it is watered and nurtured - fertilised by who you surround yourself with, what books you read, what insights you listen to, the type of environment you put yourself in.  There will be some things in life where motivation comes easy to you such as planning a 5th birthday party for your child or taking a day off work to do some clothes and shoes shopping.  There will be other areas in your life where motivation eludes you, perhaps in regards to a regular fitness programme or eating healthy foods or taking your business ideas and putting them into action?  

Ask yourself why am I motivated when it comes to parties and shopping - it could be the pleasure you get in planning something for someone special; so YOU are special to. What about the pleasure you will get in planning your fitness and healthy eating plan for someone special: YOU!  Its about getting started, it is about doing something rather than nothing; it is about getting your running shoes on or putting a new lipstick on as you take your CV into a job agency. It is about self-talk and getting rid of toxic and negative thinking, and speaking positive words around in your life.

Inspirational Quotes

You have to give your motivation muscle a workout - if you have not used it for a while then you will find it is sluggish.  So what do you do when the car is sluggish = get a tune up, put some new oil in, change the spark plugs, check out the alternator etc.  Apply that same analogy to your own life in those areas where you find motivation hard.  

You need to have a clear focus - what is one area of your life that you really want to get motivated in?   Create a MOTIVATION/VISION BOARD for that focus, write down what that focus looks like: clearly articulate and visualise the focus, hold it before you as it were as you go about your day and apply that focus when you feel that your motivation is beginning to slip.   


Igniting Dreams | Evoking Action

Love Maree